Thursday, January 04, 2007

The Harbarrowboy - future MP or first elected Mayor ?

Are you sitting down?

Then please prepare yourself for a nasty shock....
Word reaches us that Jason Harbarrowboy, aka as the Chief Executive of Nothing, harbours strong political ambitions!
(Pass the smelling salts, someone! ed)
It appears that 'Jase' - for this is the nomenclature which he apparently favours - is already putting in place his bid for power, post 2008.
Those in the know say that the Harbarrowboy has specifically enlisted the support of a London-based Public Affairs agency, LLM Communications in his campaign.
Although LLM have had no noticeably favourable impact on Liverpool's standing in Westminster (didn't the Government tell the council to go away in short jerky movements when Bradley held out his begging bowl for £8million quid for extra 2008 bobbies? ed), it seems that 'Jase' has availed himself of their 'strategic political advice.'
It is alleged that the Harbarrowboy is old friends with one of LLM's Directors and the pair have been masterminding his bid to rule the world for the last 12 months.
The Harbarrowboy is now said to be eyeing up potential seats all over the country while cosying up big time to the movers and shakers in Westminster.
Apparently those of, shall we say, a 'long in the tooth' disposition are the MP's who are being specifically targetted by the Harbarrowboy who wishes to be viewed as an anointed successor.
(This is known as ambulance-chasing in the trade, ed)
However, there are several things that are not known about this unexpected development:

1) How much LLM are being paid by the people of Liverpool for their services?

2) Whether LLM were appointed in accordance with the council's strict procurement rules and regulations?

3) Whether the Harbarrowboy used the Culture Company's confused status as a separate entity to avoid the rules and simply phoned up his mates in London and offered them the gig?

4) Whether any relationships or conflicts of interests have been declared by anyone?

5) Whether any councillors have had any involvement in this murky matter?

6) Whether this is another example of Harbarrowboy's lobbying for a private company (shades of CMP and the Summer Pops again, ed).

The most important, intriguing and baffling question of all is this, however:

"Which political party will the Harbarrowboy be representing?"

Or more likely "Who the **** will admit the Harbarrowboy to their ranks?"
  • Cameron's new-look Conservatives? (Jase is a bit vulgar for the old Etonian, methinks, ed)

  • Gormless Gordon's charisma-free administration, post Blair? (Anything's possible I suppose and interestingly, LLM are said to be connected to certain Labour establishment figures, ed)

  • Or Ming's meandering middle of the roaders ? (I would have thought our old friend Councillor Storey might have had some strong representations to make to Ming. And anyway Ming won't last the year as Leader, ed)

Perhaps, in reality, (some mistake here, surely? ed) 'Jase' believes that 2008 will be such a triumph that he will be carried shoulder high by a grateful populace to the door of the Town Hall where the good burghers of the city will have stumped up enough cash and goodwill to enable him to stand as an Independent?

Or maybe 'Jase' secretly fancies his chances of riding the crest of a tsunami of popularity to become the first elected Mayor of Liverpool? (ohmygawd! ed)

Remember, you read it here first....Oh, what interesting times we do live in.

Editor's note: Readers of this particular posting are now advised to go and lie down in a darkened room for several hours while pressing a cold compress to their tortured brows.


Anonymous said...

Jeepers! All those who think he should begin to do the day job properly first put their hands up

Anonymous said...

He might be a BNP candidate?

Tori Blare said...

I'm emigrating if he gets in!
Has the council not learned anything from the past few Months?
I still say get rid of them all and start again.

Anonymous said...

Not even the BNP wpould have him.

Tony Parrish47 said...

Let's just hold on a moment, folks. The Harbarrowboy may be many things, but I don't think there is any evidence at all that he a racist scum bag. If he was, we would have given him a much tougher time these last few months, believe you me. Let's concentrate on the things we know - self-serving, a crude barrow boy, greedy, cowardly and no idea about culture or Liverpool. We can forget the racist bit.

Anonymous said...

handy with a ukele though apparently

Tony Parrish47 said...

Perhaps he fancies a shot at the Wigan constituency then!

Anonymous said...

to get serious for a should know that Sir Diddy has run as fast as his little legs will carry him to his solicitors, following the post on the henshaw evil cabal blog about the Guardian lecture. he is threatening writs, libel actions, injunctions, judiucial reviews and all kinds of other legal jiggery pokery to again try and close the blog down. his solicitors are brabners again. This has all come from a colleague of his wife (who is herself a nice person, given who she lives with). Sir Diddy is also apparently in regular contact with Mceilhenny and halsall and the three of them met for dinner before xmas at a hotel in Cheshire - but i doubt whether Diddy paid! One bizarre thing - he has also been talking to the cops to see if he can persuade them to do something. he says he is being persecuted! The irony of it! He is really worried about the Guardian lecture and whether anyone is going to take the piss out of him publicly in front of the great and the good and has seriously talked to someone from the guardian about improving security or pulling out! christ knows who he thinks he is. but his solicitors have advised him to carry on. He is apparently furious at Finnegan and the Tony Parrish campaign, which appears to have had a big impact at westminster amongst labour mps and in other local councils. according to the girls, henshaw is afraid that he is now regarded as being completely persona non grata and worries constantly about important people snubbing him. which must be true!
but the best news is this - they are talking about leaving liverpool and moving somewhere else! hurrah!
anyway, watch out for the lawyers lads - even though he is full of the usual bluster, you never know what he will do when he gets in a tizz. and he has got the money. will try to keep you up-dated on any other developments...