Monday, November 13, 2006

THE BALD LEGAL EAGLE AND HIS HUNT FOR OUR HERO


It seems that the city council's forlorn and rather pathetic search for the first ever Tony Parrish is continuing.
Acting City Solicitor Michael Kenworthy has stepped forward for the role of Private Dick as chief aide to Inspector Clueless, Councillor Marbrow.
Kenworthy, fresh from his historic High Court defeat in the Battle of Edge Lane, is leaving no stone unturned in the bid to track down our hero, apparently.
Emails are being scanned, documents examined, files opened, computers logged, councillors questioned and staff hilariously entertained.
Inspector Clueless has been recruited as chief IT expert and fount of all knowledge on all matters technical (shurely some mistake? ed)
Councillors
are also being questioned by Kenworthy about what they know and who they know it about (this should be an interesting exchange, ed)
It seems the bald legal eagle Kenworthy
has vowed that he will not be happy until he has alighted on his quarry.
"It is my raison d'etre" he opined, to one startled member of staff.
Puffing himself up to his full height of 5'8", Kenworthy jowels
reddened with rage as he stamped his feet and accused our hero TP of "making defamatory statements about my staff."
Which leaves us all scratching our heads a bit.
Who appointed Kenworthy as the council's Private Dick?
Which council staff were maligned in such a terrible way?
Surely it can't have been
1) Sir Diddy? (a greedy blackmailer, ed)

2) The rottweiller McElhinney? (a lying thief, ed)
3) The sm
iling assasin Halsall? (nuff said, ed)
Perhaps it was the council's Head of Internal Audit, Gerry Callaghan, whose integrity shattered in pieces when he snitched to Halsall about the dosssier of evidence
against McElhinney. (I thought he had finally retired? ed)
So if not them - and the city council would be a bit madder than usual to defend these cabalists after the £520million KPMG report - then who? And for what? All TP's allegations were true!
Incidentally, our hero is safe and well in a secure house across the water where he is being fed grapes and having his every whim catered for by an army of admiring bloggers.
Perhaps the bald legal eagle thinks he will succeed City Solicitor Grame Creer if he can apprehend the first Tony Parrish?
In which case, his chances of promotion appear exceedingly remote.
In the meantime, we are sure he can have lots of fun in his one-man crusade - it sure bea
ts the hell out of getting whupped by grandmothers in the High Court, doesn't it?

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

You should know that he has been trying to speak to John Brown, the partner of jane wolstenholme of the daily post. do journalists at the post believe in protecting sources? would they?

Anonymous said...

What a plonker - He should try and do his day job properly

Dave said...

unbelievable. have they not got anything better to do with their timre and our money?

Anonymous said...

He is a typical bureaucrat - useless at doing anything useful.

Tori Blare said...

Tell the bald one to look no further,
I am Tony Parrish and so is my wife.

Disbeliever said...

Chocolate teapot!